It’s all in the family

Why most americans can look to extended family for increased health and happiness

At the last family picnic, your Uncle Fred amused your kids by pulling quarters out of their ears and chasing them in circles around the playground until they collapsed. It’s the same ploy he used 20 years ago to amuse you and your cousins.

Most of us have an Uncle “Fred” in our family or a cousin “Elaine.” (You know, the one who makes the same great pasta salad for the reunion every year.) As a small child, they delighted you; as a teenager their eccentricities embarrassed you; as an adult, you just took them for granted. But did you know that these familial encounters not only provide positive experiences but also can play a large role in how successful and happy you are in life?

“Families through time have changed, but they have not declined in importance to Americans,” says Dr. Vern Bengtson, professor of gerontology and sociology at the University of Southern California in Los Angeles. “Multi-generational bonds represent a valuable resource for families in the 21^st Century and are becoming more important than nuclear family ties for well-being and support over the course of our lives.”

Considering the important role of family relationships today, it is heartening to discover that an overwhelming majority of Americans claim that maintaining ties with their extended relatives is an important facet of their lives. And, despite the far-flung geographic distances often separating today’s families, an equally large portion of Americans consider it a priority to actually have in-person contact with their extended family.

Modern Woodmen of America, a fraternal benefits society dedicated to helping people achieve quality family life, sponsored a Harris Interactive survey on the family.  Poll results indicate that most Americans aged 25 to 65 (98 percent) believe it is good for children to know their relatives and family history. (Results of this survey are based on 1,001 random telephone interviews.) Americans connect with their families through a variety of gathering activities, such as holiday meals, weddings, birthday parties, reunions, family vacations and less formal get-togethers. In fact, the survey indicates that approximately nine out of 10 Americans have attended a family event in the past three years, and 72 percent of Americans attend multiple family gatherings throughout the year. (Twenty-six percent attended gatherings three to six times a year, 25 percent once a month or more and 21 percent seven to 11 times a year.)

Why? The reasons vary and overlap. Americans cite everything from the noble desire of providing their children the opportunity to know their relatives and about their family heritage to participating just because family events are fun.

“Face-to-face contact provides the contextual part of what it means to be family,” explains Michael Benjamin, executive director for the Council On Family Relations in Minneapolis, Minn. “It’s the substance behind families, because you can actually see what’s going on with people, how they are interacting, and how they are feeling. Other forms of communication such as email or letters or photographs, while important to maintaining contact, can’t convey the same experience.

“All members play their own role in each family, and the reunion is the stage,” Benjamin adds. “You get to know that Uncle Joe is the<